Reality Check: I am Now Considered Disabled

My disabled placard
I whited out my number for security purposes.

Facing Reality

I got my California Disabled Placard in the mail and the reality hit me fast. I am now considered to be disabled.

I never thought of myself as disabled growing up. However, recent changes in my health have forced me to make a great deal of changes in how I operate my life. For starters, I can’t sit for hours on end at my laptop anymore. I have to take frequent breaks and use ergo cushions and a medical grade back brace.

I’m well aware that there are plenty of people who abuse the use of disabled placards. I’m not one of them. I have a number of health issues, including Osteoporosis and Interstitial Cystitis (it’s a painful bladder disease.) Basically, my bones are as weak as an elderly person and I have back pain and chest pain frequently from it. My Interstitial Cystitis causes me pelvic pain. On bad days I wear by back brace and user a walker with a tens machine strapped to me and take pain meds.

Driving around looking for a parking space a few weeks ago, I had spasms of pain as I walked to my destination. It got to the point where I didn’t want to go out because I didn’t want to walk from my car to my destination and back. My neurologist hubby pointed out that my medical issues could be grounds for a disabled placard. I spoke to my primary care physician and my urologist. They both agreed that I was a candidate for a disabled placard. I felt relieved they seemed to understand that my pain was real and hard to live with.

Making The Best of My Circumstances

I do physical therapy to try to get my body stronger so that it mitigates the pain. It’s helping a bit. But I always seem to regress if I spend a day out doing something with my family. I stay home a lot still. The  tens machine, which transmits an electrical current between leads, is one of my favorite things to alleviate pain. Also, I use a lot of Chinese Tiger Balm, which makes me smell like menthol and camphor.

I don’t like the label of being disabled because I don’t like being anything that could be considered not normal. But then again, I’ve never quite been normal. I was never one of the crowd. I’m not your typical anything. I don’t blend in. I teach my daughters that it’s okay to be different. Roxy has been taught to be proud to be adopted because I don’t want to make her ashamed of it.

So shouldn’t I do the same for myself? I am who I am. Right now that means I am disabled, usually wearing a black back brace. I figure my family and friends, the ones who count anyway, will love me for who I am, disabled or not. I’ve been a champion for adoption. I guess now, I will become a champion for the disabled as well.

For all of my readers, thank you for walking by me and lifting me up, regardless of who I am or how my life has changed.

XOXO Jax

 

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